I'm torn between 2 feelings. I'm both happy and heartbroken for whats going to happen in the future. I should be happy but I can't get over this pain in my heart, like it's literally breaking. I wish I didn't feel this way. It feels like my soul is being shredded, my heart is being crushed by my sorrow. I wish I were numb, dead inside so I can go on without this pain in my heart. I wish I could lock away my feelings of her, lock away my memories of her beauty and the joy she made me feel... but her face is forever etched into my mind and I will forever be tormented by the fact that I've lost the one thing that made me happy to exist. and now